Tag Archive: reflection

The following reflective activities are used when there’s a difficulty with transference: post shift debriefs, personal reflections, team meetings, frequent supervision, reflective practice groups, one-to-ones with another staff member.

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We work to involve young people in discussions and reflections on their maladaptive behaviours (although we don’t always call them this!). When done with empathy and sensitivity, staff can offer ways of understanding why they need to act in this way. This is a much more therapeutic and productive approach verses punishment and blame, which they have sometimes experienced elsewhere. Having new options and gaining different perspectives can be really powerful.

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The Emotional Thermometer by Alistair Cooper and Sheila Redfern

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A tool for parents. 

What it is..

The Emotional Thermometer is a way of keeping in mind how strong your feelings are at any given moment. Use this thermometer as a gauge of when it’s best to act, and when it might be better to wait.

 

It helps you by…

The Emotional Thermometer helps you become more aware of what you are feeling and how intensely you are experiencing the feeling. This awareness will allow you to find ways to reduce the impact of your feeling and bring you into a calmer state of mind.

 

It helps your child by…

The Emotional Thermometer helps your child because the more regulated you are feeling when you interact with him, the less likely you are of overreacting. Your child will see that you take responsibility for your feelings.

 

It helps your relationship by..

Keeping in mind your emotional thermometer makes it less likely situations will escalate beyond control and will help you to understand your child’s feelings and bring you closer together.

 

Keep in mind…

  1. Use the concept of the emotional thermometer as a gauge of when it’s best to act, and when it might be better to wait.
  2. Notice your thoughts and emotions to develop your ability to be a more reflective parent.
  3. When you start to notice your own feelings, you can then reflect on how you are coming across.
  4. Use friends and networks to help you.
  5. Be accepting of how you feel and how your child feels.
  6. Remember your child is just a child, with a separate and totally different set of thoughts and feelings from you, which represent both his age and the things going on in his life.

 

© 2016 Alistair Cooper and Sheila Redfern.

From Reflective Parenting: A Guide to Understanding What’s Going on in Your Child’s Mind by Alistair Cooper, Sheila Redfern

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A culture of reflection and enquiry

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“We create a culture of reflection and enquiry. Opportunities to think about feelings, behaviours and thoughts are offered following all events, like home leave or difficult situations. The aim of the discussion is to help the young person reflect on the experience and learn from it and feel acknowledged.”

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Identify emotions that welcome positive change

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“The team work to manage any strong emotions such as anger or aggressive behaviour. We continually reflect on the meaning of the young person’s emotional expression and behaviour, and during time with them identify emotions that welcome positive change.”

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